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A life redeemed: Even after four abortions, woman finds healing and hope

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Starr Rogers’ story is a reminder that redemption and healing are possible, even when devastation comes from a person’s own choices. After a series of affairs and abortions, Rogers planned her suicide, but at the last minute, found a path to healing that she says is possible for anyone.

Rogers’ story began when she was married at 16, but she soon  found herself pregnant with the child of a married man with whom she was having an affair. She passed off that child, a daughter, as her husband’s. But the affair continued, and over the course of the decade, it lasted. She became pregnant four more times—and each time, she aborted her baby. Her first marriage ended, and she married the man with whom she had the affair.

And she got pregnant again. As with her previous four pregnancies, she says:

“[H]e pitched a fit and demanded of me that I get rid of this pregnancy, too. So, I traveled to Atlanta. I was in my third trimester and Alabama wouldn’t allow an abortion that far along.”

Then an unusual thing happened in Atlanta:

“I entered the Atlanta abortion clinic. When you go into to these places, all they want to do is get you in and get your money. They sent me in to talk to this lady, and she was supposed to do all of this stuff. However, when I met with her, it was the strangest thing. She told me all the things that they would do with my baby. She even showed me where they put the babies after they were aborted. She told me, ‘Don’t do this!’ She said, ‘Go back to Alabama and have my baby.’ That’s what I did. I had a son.”

However, the pain of the previous four abortions would not leave her. Peace was elusive, Rogers says:

“There was a constant churning inside of me all the time. I had so much rage that I just wanted to kill everybody. The anger, the rage, and my broken heart were unbearable. Trying to numb my anger and pain, I kept having other extramarital affairs, but I found no satisfaction in a man. I planned my suicide. I wrote letters to each one of my children about how sorry I was for committing suicide and that I loved them, but I just couldn’t take the pain anymore.”

And there, at the bottom of her hope and the pinnacle of her pain, she found the key to new life in a place she didn’t expect. In a library, she picked up a local Christian magazine and saw the words: “Do you need healing from your abortions?” A phone number followed, and she called. It was the number of a post-abortion Bible study called Sisters in Christ.

Rogers decided to give the Bible study a chance and started classes, but she says, “I was so messed up that the counselor had to do a one-on-one with me instead of in a group.” And it wasn’t easy. The lives of four children haunted her heart, along with her many affairs, which had continued in her second marriage as both husband and wife had multiple affairs. The  years of destruction in her life didn’t come with an easy fix: it took her three years to feel she had significant healing—but she did. Rejoicing at her freedom and the testimony of the power of God to heal her, she says:

“I am healed and able to forgive myself for murdering my children. I came to know our sweet, precious Savior and learned how amazing it is that He shed His blood for us. He, alone, can take you in His arms and wipe all the stains away.”

Rogers wants women to know there is healing for them, that abortion, and the pain and guilt that follow it are not life sentences.

“I would tell any woman who is post-abortive to get into a Bible based post-abortion study. With that you will know freedom and come to know Jesus as our savior and our redeemer. He’s the only one that can release us from this bondage.”

Despite the years of pain and even the time to heal, Rogers is now using her pain and testimony to help other women find hope. She is a story of redemption, and her life reveals the truth that it’s never too late for anyone to find hope and healing.

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