“Do you want to keep it?” The factor of desire in choosing abortion
The 2013 Grammy Awards Celebration was full of talented musicians, outrageously expensive dresses, and Hollywood glam. Though I wasn’t a fan of all the performances, I found some endearing. Country singer Hunter Hayes sang lyrics from his hit single, “Wanted.” What’s not to like about a chorus that says, “I want to make you feel wanted”? The words speak to one of our deepest core needs as humans.
Many in the pro-choice community echo the phrase “every child should be a wanted child.” Upon first hearing the mantra, most would agree with it. Decent people desire all children to be wanted, albeit we live in a world in which that’s not always possible. However, the “every child should be a wanted child” motto isn’t a happy wish for a world where all children are equally loved. It’s a statement declaring that if unborn children are unwanted by their parents, it’s acceptable for them to be terminated.
Part of the fear of “unwanted” children is the belief that they may face neglect and abuse. People understandably worry about more hurting children in the world. However, eliminating potentially hurting children by killing them is by no means a great solution.
There’s also the idea that neglect can turn kids into delinquent, rebellious individuals who place a drain on society. That belief is problematic because we can’t entirely predict the unknown. Studies and statistics tell us something, but not everything. Some pregnant women don’t initially want their children but grow into wonderful mothers. Other moms give birth without complaint but end up abusing their children later in life. Poor minorities can become business leaders, and wealthy kids may be crack addicts one day.
Regardless of what type of person the child will become, a better question is “do we think a growing human deserves protection?” Children are not designer shoes, after all. It’s okay to say I can’t afford these Manolo Blahniks, so I’ll pass. Or I really want these new Louboutins, so I’ll sacrifice to have them. When it comes to children, shouldn’t we be looking past our personal wants and desires?
I read through the comment section on a Jezebel article titled “What’s the best age to have an abortion?” I was saddened by women who glibly declared that they got pregnant but for whatever reasons didn’t want the child and aborted. They didn’t regret it, and some were proud of their decision. Perhaps they felt that if they didn’t want the child, why should they feel bad about terminating it’s life?
Even though I was scheduled to be aborted, my mother told me she really did want me. That’s likely why she was able to leave the hospital at the last minute. What if she hadn’t wanted me? Would that have justified taking my life? Should a parent’s personal desire influence the protection children should rightfully be afforded in the womb? Children are more than parasites living off hosts. There is a dignity to human life that deserves respect.
The children in the Newtown shootings huddled close to their teachers and cried because they didn’t want to die. There’s a reason why third-trimester babies flinch when an abortionist’s forceps come close.
People argue the tired rhetoric of “my body, my choice.” Yet we have laws that prohibit what we can do to our body. Even if I want to (which I don’t), I can’t legally prostitute my body in the U.S. I can’t even legally order contact lenses without a prescription from a yearly doctor’s exam. The government and health care professionals are so concerned about the health of my eyes that they’ve enacted laws that keep me from damaging them. Yet no such laws protect me from dismembering a growing fetus in my womb and potentially endangering myself. This is lunacy at best.
Some people abort a child now to have another child with the “right one” later. Some abort one twin and keep another. Millions abort girls because they want a boy, while others abort babies with cleft palates. Some people have five abortions because they can’t find a birth control plan that works. Is this the so-called “freedom” of choice?
Abortion is morally wrong, whether we admit it or not. Just because we want to do something, that doesn’t mean it’s right or good. On the other hand, there are things we may not want to do but should. Responsibility and love beckon us to know the difference and act accordingly.