Many abortion clinic workers have been ready to leave for some time - but they need help getting out.

“Do you want to keep it?” The factor of desire in choosing abortion

The 2013 Grammy Awards Celebration was full of talented musicians, outrageously expensive dresses, and Hollywood glam. Though I wasn’t a fan of all the performances, I found some endearing. Country singer Hunter Hayes sang lyrics from his hit single, “Wanted.” What’s not to like about a chorus that says, “I want to make you feel wanted”? The words speak to one of our deepest core needs as humans.

ultrasoundMany in the pro-choice community echo the phrase “every child should be a wanted child.” Upon first hearing the mantra, most would agree with it. Decent people desire all children to be wanted, albeit we live in a world in which that’s not always possible. However, the “every child should be a wanted child” motto isn’t a happy wish for a world where all children are equally loved. It’s a statement declaring that if unborn children are unwanted by their parents, it’s acceptable for them to be terminated.

Part of the fear of “unwanted” children is the belief that they may face neglect and abuse. People understandably worry about more hurting children in the world. However, eliminating potentially hurting children by killing them is by no means a great solution.

There’s also the idea that neglect can turn kids into delinquent, rebellious individuals who place a drain on society. That belief is problematic because we can’t entirely predict the unknown. Studies and statistics tell us something, but not everything. Some pregnant women don’t initially want their children but grow into wonderful mothers. Other moms give birth without complaint but end up abusing their children later in life. Poor minorities can become business leaders, and wealthy kids may be crack addicts one day.

Regardless of what type of person the child will become, a better question is “do we think a growing human deserves protection?” Children are not designer shoes, after all. It’s okay to say I can’t afford these Manolo Blahniks, so I’ll pass. Or I really want these new Louboutins, so I’ll sacrifice to have them. When it comes to children, shouldn’t we be looking past our personal wants and desires?

I read through the comment section on a Jezebel article titled “What’s the best age to have an abortion?” I was saddened by women who glibly declared that they got pregnant but for whatever reasons didn’t want the child and aborted. They didn’t regret it, and some were proud of their decision. Perhaps they felt that if they didn’t want the child, why should they feel bad about terminating it’s life?

Even though I was scheduled to be aborted, my mother told me she really did want me. That’s likely why she was able to leave the hospital at the last minute. What if she hadn’t wanted me? Would that have justified taking my life? Should a parent’s personal desire influence the protection children should rightfully be afforded in the womb? Children are more than parasites living off hosts. There is a dignity to human life that deserves respect.

The children in the Newtown shootings huddled close to their teachers and cried because they didn’t want to die. There’s a reason why third-trimester babies flinch when an abortionist’s forceps come close.

People argue the tired rhetoric of “my body, my choice.” Yet we have laws that prohibit what we can do to our body. Even if I want to (which I don’t), I can’t legally prostitute my body in the U.S. I can’t even legally order contact lenses without a prescription from a yearly doctor’s exam. The government and health care professionals are so concerned about the health of my eyes that they’ve enacted laws that keep me from damaging them. Yet no such laws protect me from dismembering a growing fetus in my womb and potentially endangering myself. This is lunacy at best.

Some people abort a child now to have another child with the “right one” later. Some abort one twin and keep another. Millions abort girls because they want a boy, while others abort babies with cleft palates. Some people have five abortions because they can’t find a birth control plan that works. Is this the so-called “freedom” of choice?

Abortion is morally wrong, whether we admit it or not. Just because we want to do something, that doesn’t mean it’s right or good. On the other hand, there are things we may not want to do but should. Responsibility and love beckon us to know the difference and act accordingly.

  • Jo Martin

    Bless you Christina Martin for all you have done to try to save all these beautiful little souls Surely there will be a special place in Heaven for someone like you and and all of these little ones. In the ’60’s when abortion was illegal I was pregnant at 17,still in high school with no place to turn. I went to an unwed mother’s home so I could put my baby up for adoption. I wanted my baby so much, but I had no way to provide for a child. I wanted my baby to have a good home with 2 loving parents that could give him everything he needed. When he was 18, I started looking for him, took 8 years but it happened. He now has 2 loving families, his adoptive family and his birth mother and family. I never considered him not my son and I love him as much as the 3 children I got to raise. I don’t understand how anyone can not see abortion as anything but murder and not know that someday they will have to answer to GOD for their actions.

  • Technically, my oldest child was an “unwanted” child. My Pill failed. I was nowhere near ready – in my mind – to be a parent, and though I was married, my (now ex-) husband did not want ANY kids. I just couldn’t find any reason to justify abortion. I was married, though only for 3 months. I had a supportive family. I was not in school and did not have a burgeoning career. And while I felt like this was not the best time to have a baby, and I really did not WANT a baby at 21, I knew I COULD be a parent, even if it was hard. I knew I wanted to go through an abortion far less than I wanted to be a parent. My ex told me he wanted me to have an abortion, without actually using the word ‘abortion’. I thought and cried, and thought and cried, and eventually I decided I just could not live with myself if I did. And yes, life was hard sometimes. REALLY hard. But that baby is now a beautiful, intelligent 18 year old woman. She has a brother, 2 half-brothers, a half-sister, and a step brother whose lives would be very different without her, as would mine, her grandparents, her father, her stepfather, stepmother, etc. She was never abused, neglected, or mistreated, though she certainly didn’t get everything she wanted. Just because a child is not a WANTED child doesn’t mean they won’t be loved. It doesn’t mean they will have a bad life. And it doesn’t mean they have any less of a right to life than I do.

    • Ashley

      God bless you for choosing life for your daughter. I’m sure she’s an incredible woman.

  • Ashley

    Speaking of being proud of abortions. I stumbled upom this website because of and started crying. I am so sick at my stomach-