man silent

“If you don’t have a uterus, zip it!”

A small group of college girls sit on the floor doing what girls love to do most: talk. Two of the students are pregnant, and conversation centers on the options before them, including abortion. Suddenly, a deep voice booms from the TV across the room, drawing their attention to the bald, fluffy-faced man on the screen who arrogantly announces,

“And now our conservative, all-male panel will discuss the future of women’s reproductive rights.”

The above scenario was portrayed in a cartoon I saw hanging in a coworker’s cubicle. It reflects a common sentiment: when it comes to abortion, men should stay out of it. The idea is that abortion is exclusively a women’s issue, and thus men have no right to interfere. Let’s talk about that.

My right to speak out should not be based on this (or my lack thereof).
My right to speak out should not be based on this (or my lack thereof).

As a father of two (one on the way), I know how this baby stuff works. I can say with total certainty that women do not create babies alone. They co-create them…with men. Furthermore, by default, approximately 50% of aborted babies are boys (at least in the U.S). I say that qualifies us males to speak on the issue. See, contrary to popular opinion, abortion is not solely a women’s rights issue; it is a human rights issue.

Yet still, even some pro-lifers shudder when men dare to assert the irrefutable science and simple common sense which support the right to life. Consider this: does the gender of a speaker affect the truth of what is spoken? Do facts become less factual when uttered by a fool? Of course not.

If a purple chipmunk tells you the earth is round, the earth is still round. (For the record, if a purple chipmunk actually talks to you, for the sake of sanity you should flee immediately. Perhaps toss some acorns over your shoulder to distract the creature from giving chase.)

We all know that pro-abortion radicals have no problem with male politicians speaking in support of abortion, or male lobbyists fighting for federal funding of Planned Parenthood, or male doctors performing abortions. But the minute a man speaks out for life, it’s “HEY! If you don’t have a uterus, ZIP IT!!!”

No, Madame Anger, I will not zip it. Unless you are trying to tell me my fly is down, in which case, thank you. I will zip it slowly and carefully.

Guys, I don’t know about you, but I for one am tired of being told that because I can never carry a child, I can’t stick up for one. It’s time to stop bowing to prejudice. It’s time to start being men.

In conclusion, to those who burn with rage when we men have the nerve to stand up for life, I offer this humble apology: please forgive us for being born male. What were we thinking?

Editor’s Note: This article was first published on March 22, 2013 on Live Action News. We believe it deserves another good look this weekend.

  • Basset_Hound

    So by using their “logic” I can’t speak out against filthy “puppy mills” because I am not a dog.

    • http://twitter.com/DannyBurton88 Danny Burton

      Right, and if you couldn’t afford a slave, don’t speak out against slavery.

    • Damien Johnson

      Well, these people also are not unborn babies so they have no right to champion a “right” to kill them.

    • pointe4Jesus

      And whites shouldn’t have gotten involved in the civil rights movement because they weren’t black.

    • Leslie Dawson

      keep bitches in check: MANHOOD101. C O M

    • Leslie Dawson

      Time to tell the truth about women: http://manhood101.com

    • MamaBear

      OK, Belgium, Netherlands, and Oregon, listen up. If you are not terminal, you have no right to decide euthanasia. (Or manipulate people into assisted suicide by denying appropriate care even if you are trying to save money.) And I don’t know any terminal people who do support euthanasia.
      Exact same logic as only those with uteruses decide abortion.

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  • blair miller

    I’d hate it when people say, you can’t say abortion is wrong because your not the right gender or have neaver been in that horrid situation. Um newsflash I don’t need to be in that situation or the right gender to know its Wrong! We say murder is wrong, but not all of us had some one in our ffamily murder. But we still no its wrong, so why can that be the same with abortion as well?

  • MoonChild02

    It also helps to know that the entire panel of judges for the case Roe v. Wade, as well as that for the case Doe v. Bolton, were made up of men. So, if they say that men are not allowed to have a say, or even an opinion, about abortion, then they are shooting themselves in the foot.

    • http://twitter.com/DannyBurton88 Danny Burton

      Bingo. Radical pro-abortionists are like dictators: as long as we agree with them we can say whatever we want.

      • Basset_Hound

        That’s true of any one of a number of politically correct causes.

    • Damien Johnson

      I brought that up with a pro-abort, and she said Roe vs Wade was made legal because of the women that made their voices heard.

      • Ingrid Heimark

        Since a majority of woemn oppose abortion, I think that is a fallacy

      • Juss Tredd’n

        Roe v. Wade wasn’t an abortion rights case; it was a right of privacy case. When discussing your pro-life stance with a pro-abort, kindly remind them it is helpful to know a subject.

        • Damien Johnson

          there is that as well, but there’s also in that it was used to make abortion legal…

    • DianaG2

      Good one. Never even thought of that.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=502513834 Carol Batson-Pruden

    We have taught a generation of young men to be callous towards their children. By saying “you can’t love or want this child, I’m aborting it” and turning around and saying “you have to love THIS child and support it for the next 18 years” we have given our men mixed and confusing signals. It is natural to love your children, and yet, our men are controlled in a way by being told when it is ok to form that attachment. We need to be more proactive with our boys and teach them the emotional consequences of an unwanted pregnancy before it happens.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Doc-Kimble/100001742531811 Doc Kimble

    What females are really saying by trying to keep men out of the conversation, I think, is that they are more damaged by the abortion choice than are the males. Ironically, this ignores the issue of marriage and childbirth and their benefits for both the female and the male. I think that’s the whole point of Traditional marriage: mutual self-protection….man from his baser natural instincts, woman from her weaker nature…. bringing her a protector from those baser things which men do, like rape, or kidnapping, war etc…In marriage, the two become one, an exclusive, unique relationship which creates exclusively unique children which are produced by their love and meant to be under the mutual protection and love of the parents. So, this anti-male verbiage is really anti-family language, and, ironically, anti-female language. Obviously, then, wisdom and truth are not gender-specific.

  • Guest

    Excellent article! I totally agree with you. Men have just as much of a right to speak out against abortion cuz it’s their kid, too! God bless you.

    • http://twitter.com/DannyBurton88 Danny Burton

      Thanks friend, God Bless you too :)

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  • musiciangirl591

    our SFL president is a man, he gets alot of flack from some pro choicers on campus because they think he “shouldn’t have a voice in the matter”

    • Kat

      Our pro-life club gets a lot of flack on campus when we don’t have any females present at our tables too. yet, even once there is a female present, they don’t take us any more seriously.

  • http://madamescherzo.tumblr.com/ Mme Scherzo

    It is the same argument used against anyone who speaks out against the injustice of affirmative action. If you are white, you can’t speak against it or you’ll be a racist. If you are black and speak against it you are a race traitor. If you are any other minority shut up, I think they mean.

  • Kristin

    Not only that but it once again puts everything about bearing children on the women, as if it’s our job because we are women. As a feminist, I was always offended by this. Saying men can’t talk about it is basically implementing outdated gender roles suggesting women have to do with all things concerning babies. Oh and it’s not like anyone tells us we can’t have a say on circumcision just because we don’t have penises, and women wouldn’t accept that anyway.

    • http://twitter.com/DannyBurton88 Danny Burton

      Amen lol great point on circumcision!

    • Ryan Frost

      If my mom didn’t have a say on circumcision I would still have my foreskin…. :(

  • Eduardo Pereira

    I’m Brazilian, and in my country, people speak much against abortion and there are many men defending life, but there is too afraid to speak of homosexuality in Brazil.

    It is necessary for men to speak in favor of life and against abortion, BUT IS ALSO NECESSARY for women to speak AGAINST male homosexuality. Women have to face the Gays … because this is a difficult task for men, for when a man speaks against homosexuality, is called “closeted gay”, this causes many constraints to man, but WHEN A WOMAN SPEAKS AGAINST male homosexuality, the gays are without action ….. the gay male FEAR WOMEN ….. this is the secret ….

    BUT UNFORTUNATELY, women have been complacent about homosexuality …

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=544576223 Elizabeth Luyben

      While I don’t see what the radical homosexual agenda has to do with pro-life issues I am happy to hear that the Brazilians are speaking against abortion. I don’t think the problem is homosexuality per-se, but the extremist agenda forcing us to comply, contribute and bow down to it. There are many injustices inflicted upon our morals & the basic fabric of society in the name of “rights”. However, the right to life is paramount as no other right matters if you’re killed.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jonathan-Kuperberg/698603245 Jonathan Kuperberg

        I have been called “closeted” on several liberal boards lately for speaking out against the radical homosexual agenda from the perspective of a pro-life male. I sympathise, Eduardo.

      • Marauder

        I don’t see what the radical ANTI-homosexual agenda has to do with pro-life issues, either. Abortion and LGBT issues are two totally separate things.

        • DianaG2

          Yes, absolutely.

    • Deege

      Homosexual male couples do not risk unintended pregnancy or have abortions. They’re not part of the abortion discussion. I have no idea why you think they fear women, who are often their best friends. In any case, what you are talking about is social conservatism and/or religious values, which prolifers don’t necessarily agree about.

      In my opinion, one of the reasons the prolife movement in the US is not bigger and more successful is that it is perceived by social liberals who might be on the fence about abortion (and I’ve met quite a few) as being an exclusive club for religious conservatives. The fight to eliminate abortion can’t be won by conservatives alone, it needs consensus from everyone. To me, a prolifer who is not a social conservative, eliminating abortion is completely consistent with progressive values: It’s an issue of social justice, a human rights cause, and the ULTIMATE safety net for human beings. All it takes to oppose abortion is reason. Diluting focus by attaching other unrelated issues doesn’t help get where we’re going on abortion.

      • DianaG2

        Yes, I’ve always wondered about this? I thought liberals were supposed to side with the underdog?

        Who is more of an underdog than the unborn baby inside her or his mom??

        • Marauder

          I think they see it as a win-lose situation – if the mother is going to win, the unborn baby has to lose, and they (rightfully enough) don’t want to take the position that the mother can’t win.

          • DianaG2

            I guess they do look at it as if it were a contest.

            :-((

            Everybody can win, though, and still be happy.

        • John Q

          The problem is liberals cannot understand logic. I have been discussing this (liberals wanting to help the underdog/defend the weak) with the same arguement…if you want to defend the weak, who is weaker than an unborn baby? She still hasn’t answered.

          • DianaG2

            Yes, I’m not surprised.

      • Marauder

        “In my opinion, one of the reasons the prolife movement in the US is not bigger and more successful is that it is perceived by social liberals who might be on the fence about abortion (and I’ve met quite a few) as being an exclusive club for religious conservatives.”

        Yep. I can’t put my support behind pro-life organizations that take official stances against LGBT people, the same way that I can’t put my support behind LGBT organizations that take official stances in favor of abortion. I think any and all groups would be more successful if they’d quit taking on causes beyond the scope of their official purpose.

        • DianaG2

          Yes, that is definitely the key to success: Just cut your issue narrowly.

          Otherwise, it always seems to end with counterproductive in-fighting. Then all goes south. Next thing you know, that group no longer exists at all.

          Work on that ONE issue. All else can find another venue.

    • Marauder

      You’re free to speak against homosexuality if you want, but it’s not true that gay men fear women. They’re just not sexually attracted to them. Do you fear everyone you’re not sexually attracted to? I’m assuming you don’t, so why would you assume that gay men do?

      Homosexuality, or people’s opinions about LGBT issues, also have nothing to do with abortion.

  • Bernadette

    God bless you and for standing up for those babies who can’t speak for themselves! Every man has the right to raise his child even if its mother doesn’t want to!

  • Guest

    I applaud the sentiment — reproductive justice isn’t a purely women’s issue at all, and men should definitely be involved in the conversation — but I think the cartoon is a poorly chosen example. The idea, at least in that case, isn’t that “abortion is exclusively a women’s issue” but that it does in fact involve BOTH men and women, and, hey, maybe if we’re going to talk about this, we should have at least one lady in the room.

    • http://twitter.com/DannyBurton88 Danny Burton

      The cartoon demonstrated a group of women vs. a group of men. Had the artist’s point been to promote equal participation from both genders, she likely would have portrayed a mixed group discussing the pregnancies. But of course you’re free to interpret it how you choose my friend :) Regardless of how you view the cartoon, my point here is that pro-abortion culture has attempted to silence pro-life men simply by using the fact that we can’t get pregnant, and that is not going to fly anymore. And on that point I think we agree. Thanks for the comment. :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=544576223 Elizabeth Luyben

    Well said. I appreciate a good rebuttal to the insane attacks on men with regards to this issue.

  • http://www.facebook.com/DavidParkerArtVan David Parker

    Last time my wife and I had a baby it took the two of us to conceive.

    • http://twitter.com/DannyBurton88 Danny Burton

      You and me both buddy.

  • http://twitter.com/Astraspider Astraspider

    Your opening anecdote doesn’t really support your point (that men are being told to “stay out of it”). Rather, it points to the relative male homogeneity seen forwarding pro-life legislation and pontificating at pro-life hearings. When America’s legislative bodies are only made up of 17% women (we’re still ahead of Turkmenistan! Whoohoo!), that’s maybe a structural problem, but it’s also a PR problem for your Movement. To their credit, I think they realize that, and it seems that female legislators are increasingly asked to be the spear-tip (North Dakota’s Bette Grande and Tennessee’s Marsha Blackburn come to mind). But, no, men are not being asked to “stay out of it”. They’re being asked to, at least, pretend it’s not just one big patriarchal gambit.

    • Calvin Freiburger

      “that’s maybe a structural problem, but it’s also a PR problem for your Movement.”

      Only in the eyes of sexist tools who lie about ideas they can’t refute on the intellectual level being “patriarchal gambits.” Rational people for whom gender-equality actually means what it sounds like know better than to define people’s worth by their chromosomes.

      • Marauder

        Besides, it’s America’s legislative bodies that are 17% women (according to Ms. Spider – i haven’t seen the numbers), not pro-life legislators or the pro-life movement. If both sides have a low number of female legislators, how is that only our problem?

        The arguments also presupposes that legislators are the only ones determining how a movement is seen by the public, which is far from the truth.

    • Kristiburtonbrown

      There’s plenty of women supporting and leading pro-life legislation and speaking at hearings, as you mentioned at the end. It’s just that the media often chooses not to cover that because, wow, what do we do with women who actually think a baby’s right to life is more important than their own supreme, untouchable “liberty”? Take Sandra Fluke as an example…the media got all over the idea that she supposedly wasn’t allowed to speak in committee (because of legitimate rules) and almost entirely ignored the fact that two or three pro-life women DID speak. Instead, some reported it as an all-male panel, which was totally false. So that’s the silly thing about cartoons like the one in this article…they don’t even represent what actually goes on. They just try to propagate the false idea that only men talk on this issue and that only men don’t have the right to talk.

    • DianaG2

      I really don’t understand what you are saying here.

      I love spiders, though.

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  • princessjasmine45

    Wait, so if men are being told to stay out of it, does that mean male aborionists have no right to perform an abortion?
    after all, they don’t have a uterus, so they should stop their (mal)practice altogether

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  • Rosemary Parsells

    Why is it that nobody mentions the idea that, in some cases, the woman wants to abort her child (and does), when the father of said child is more than willing and able to care for the baby if the woman were to carry full term and let him. Does the other person who co-created the child have no parental rights at all? Not in this case, they don’t.

    • Kat

      Food for thought on that note: yet once the child is born, in a medical emergency, if someone who knew first aid approached the family and asked (as they are required to) if they could help, and the parents gave different answers, it’s what the father says that goes.

      • Donna Zerrath

        Actually, I was taught as a paramedic if a child is sick or injured and the parents gave different answers, we are to listen to which ever parent wants their child helped.

  • TheIronFistOfDeath

    If someone is incapable of seeing how women’s bodily autonomy is a secondary topic in abortion, they aren’t smart enough to have an opinion. Abortion, first and foremost, is a discussion about when life beings and when ending that life becomes murder. Women’s bodily autonomy should always come second to that.

  • sk888

    NO ONE IS “PRO-ABORTION!!!”

    • Ingrid Heimark

      If you support abortion as a legitimate choice, you are pro-abortion.

    • Jonathan

      I’m pro-life, but sometimes I wish my competitors were never born. I wonder if I’m contradicting to myself with this sort of thinking.

    • Marauder

      People don’t necessarily have to consider themselves “pro”-something in order to condone it.

    • DianaG2

      Belgian chic votes up.

  • http://bloggingforwisdom.Wordpress.com/ tweeting4wisdom

    don’t have a uterus but I have seen my wife’s. Does that count?

  • DianaG2

    Brilliant article!!

    I get so tired of those ridiculous cliches myself.

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  • Jonathan

    The “reproductive right” claim is a joke. Men stay out of it? OK, if women can get pregnant without sperm.

  • Basset_Hound

    That’s like saying that I can’t speak about the cruelty of “puppy mills” because I’m not a dog.

    • Ryan Frost

      But, according to your account/pic you are a dog. so you have every right. lol

  • anne leace

    I never did get that accusation (girl here). I think the logic is that since men don’t actually go through the ordeal of pregnancy, they have no voice. This would make sense if that was WHY women got abortions. But 99% of the time I think the issue is more taking care of the kid- which is the father’s role too (which unfortunately has become disconnected in this society).

    I do *rarely* see the abortion reason being that pregnancy sucks (which it does), so in that rare case, yes, guys have no comment. But the rest? It normally is stigma (both genders) and/or raising the kid (both), in which cases guys DO get as much say.

    Really, I wish more men would get in this conversation on the other side of it- attacking the sleeping around and non-commitment to the mother mentality which plagues today’s youth and aids the abortion discussion. I dunno, but I’m pretty sure more girls wouldn’t even consider abortion if the fathers supported them…

    That’s the moral side. Science-side anyone gets a say, that’s the point of science.

    • sueforsure

      If the father says he wants the baby, sometimes the mother doesn’t want to go through the 9 months of pregnancy, ruining her figure. That is an excuse I hear. And I can’t promise a woman that pregnancy won’t give her stretch marks and ruin her shape. It’s too bad this world is so obsessed with looks.

      • anne leace

        True, that does come up. I guess it depends if the girl in question is in the scared group or the shallow group. I would think (and hope) the scared group is the larger one since that is much easier to fix than shallow…

  • JDC

    Awesome article. I loved reading it the first time, and I loved reading it again.

  • Bill Forquer

    There should be no child support payments by men since we have no choice or say in the decision if the child is to be aborted or not.

  • Jacqueline

    Excellent! Love this!

  • Wim Vanraes

    I never understood this: on one hand, if the mother decides that the unborn child is unwanted and aborts, the father has no say in that. But if the child is born, he can (and will) be obliged by law to pay alimony. How does that work? If the father, even if he said that he did not wish to father a child, can be held responsible, how come he is kept out in the whole decision process regarding abortion/live birth? They can’t have it both ways…

    • MamaBear

      But they do have it both ways.
      She wants to abort, he has no say.
      She wants to keep the baby, he pays child support for 18 years.

  • Bridget Walker

    Saying men don’t have a say in abortion is sexist!

  • John T. Bailey

    I am older now. During my high school and early adult years abortion was openly discussed and less polarized. Most people were “on the fence” and were willing to contemplate more data as non-factual. Whenever a male human would try to interject, the proof of wisdom discussion would ensue. Males were required to pass a test at the beginning of each conversation.
    How do you think a woman feels after an abortion? How would you feel if someone told you to be poor for the next 18 years because someone raped you? Many men backed off and let the “ladies” battle. Those discussions boiled down to a crispy residue of “facts.” Those “facts” were tallied and computed by cold hearted politicians. That is how the current laws were created. Men were not allowed in the grass roots movements, but were required to tally the score somehow.
    I believe males would have done a better job, (not necessarily the best possible job) if the debates would have included male participation from the onset. As time goes on males and females begin to think more alike. In Elementary School males are generally factual deciders and females are emotional deciders. As we mature we season our wisdom with both universal truths and the affect decisions will have on feelings.
    I feel women have more data inside of them as they have contemplated the data more thoroughly. I feel men can be more objective and sort the 100% truths from the 75% truths. Let us work together. Two genders are better than one.

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