Opinion

Magic Mike and the oversexualization of America

There is nothing at all magic about Mike. No, this movie exemplifies one of the worst aspects of our current culture: oversexualization. You could even say it promotes sex as commerce, or at least as a commodity. Take, as a prime example of what I’m talking about, this abbreviated Facebook conversation between young women about Magic Mike:

About to witness god’s greatest gift…Channing Tatum in Magic Mike:)

who needs a boyfriend when you get to see channing tatum in that context?!

haha seriously when I see Channing Tatum shirtless I’m yelling and giving the fist pump to full max:)

You have no idea how jealous and sad this makes me….im going to bed early,… :’(

…it was like watching chick porn:)

What has the oversexualization of our culture done to marriages and families?

For those who are not aware of what Magic Mike is all about, it’s essentially a movie about a male stripper. (Goodness, what would women say if their men went to see a movie all about a female stripper?) While the movie purportedly demonstrates a dark side of this life, it also provides many sexual scenes “on the job.” It’s another movie in a continuous line of flicks that glorifies lust and free sex for all. (And no, for the record, I have not seen Magic Mike, nor will I. My information is based off this movie review.)

You may be wondering why I’m calling out Magic Mike on a pro-life website. Well, I believe that one of the major problems causing abortion on demand is the oversexualization of America. Our culture promotes free, ready sex – consequence-free – no matter what harm it causes to anyone else.

Abortion is the “ultimate solution” that makes sex with anyone at any time consequence-free. I once read an account by a woman who wrote an entire book about her abortion experience. She openly admitted that the reason she had unprotected sex with a boyfriend was because she knew that abortion was available as a back-up plan should she get pregnant.

For those who will undoubtedly inform me that sex is not all about procreation, don’t worry…I agree with you. I do think that there are more purposes behind sex than procreation. I support every couple’s own decision to use contraception that prevents a pregnancy, if that’s what they want. I am opposed only to contraception that kills a baby who has already been created – because that’s really no different in effect from abortion.

For those who believe that we are indeed in a culture war – not just a legal war – we need to realize that oversexualization is a major battleground. And while it is about the choices people actually make, it’s even more about the choices that we are told people make. The ones that are flung in our faces, the ones that run rampant even where they’re uninvited. I’m talking about choices like having sex in junior high and high school. Lots of kids get hurt from this choice. And not as many kids make the choice as we think. But the problem is that, in school, kids are all too often pressured into thinking that having sex is the only normal choice to make.

As this 20/20 article asks:

Is this where the sexual revolution has taken us? Middle school kids feeling pressured to have sex?

The article quotes sex educator Deborah Roffman, author of Sex and Sensibility: The Thinking Parent’s Guide to Talking Sense About Sex. She emphatically believes that parents need to take a greater responsibility in their kids’ lives when it comes to sexuality. And, as an expert, she realizes the great power that intimacy has on human beings:

I always say, you know, as far as I’m concerned, sexual intercourse is the most fundamentally powerful behavior there is on the face of the Earth. It’s a behavior that has the ability to do the three most powerful things there are, all at the same time. It has the ability to give life, potentially take life away and to change it forever. That’s unbelievably powerful and therefore, it shouldn’t be in the hands of anybody who isn’t an adult, in as many ways as they need to be an adult. It’s not for kids.

The oversexualization of America has many causes and many effects. It’s caused by a lack of parental involvement, by peer pressure – even from authority figures like school nurses and teachers – by the entertainment industry (that gives us horrible junk like Magic Mike and constant near-pornographic TV commercials).

The effects of oversexualization run deep in America. We use and are used. We reject the sanctity of marriage. We downplay the value of purity and abstinence before marriage. We find more excuses and reasons to kill our children. We choose images and fake people over real people who will actually stand beside us and love us for who we are. (Does anyone else know girls who wished Edward in Twilight was their boyfriend, to replace their actual boyfriends?)

When oversexualization has made people into things to be used and objects to be looked at and discarded, is it really any wonder that our society has little problem tossing children in the trash? Literally, we are throwing the baby out with the bath water. And it’s high time to stop.

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  • vizitor

    Only form of contraception that doesnt lead to abortion is abstanence.

    • LifeofPi

      That is not universally true. I know many married couples on different forms of contraception who would never have an abortion.

      • Anonymous

        I agree that it is not “universally” true, but unfortunately when it boils down to it, any form of contraception other than abstinence lends itself toward abortion. Abstinence is the only form which will not end in pregnancy. All other forms of birth control could possibly end in pregnancy, which, if not wanted, could send anyone towards termination of that pregnancy.

        • lara

          I know couples who use birth control that doesn’t cause abortions, and when they were the 1% and got pregnant anyway despite a vasectomy, they kept their child and I babysat for them. All contraception does not cause abortions. The pill can, but abortion is ultimately the result of someone choosing to do it, not pregnancy prevention.

  • Anonymous

    “(Goodness, what would women say if their men went to see a movie all about a female stripper?)”
    You can just go ahead and ask them; there are MANY movies about or featuring female strippers! To name just a few: Showgirls, Strip Tease, Closer, Powder Blue, and I’m sure there are many more. Women are almost always the ones getting naked on film and TV. (And in real life, there are way more clubs featuring female dancers than male dancers. I know this because I just planned my best friend’s bachelorette party.)

    Nudity doesn’t necessarily make a bad movie though; Magic Mike actually has good reviews since there’s a solid plot behind the stripping. (On the other end of the spectrum is “Fifty Shades of Grey”: insanely popular but from what I understand, terrible writing and plot.) I understand your point, and obviously no one is going to make you see the movie, but actually it’s been so profitable that there’s already a sequel in the works. It just seems kind of like a losing battle.

    • gigi4747

      “there are MANY movies about or featuring female strippers!”
      I broke up with a guy a few years ago (who was big into the prolife movement, went to church every Sunday, etc) because he defended the practice of guys doing a stripper bachelor party. I’m not defending Magic Mike, but it seems to me that a far greater source of dehumanization and oversexualization, etc is the *actual* sex industry (as opposed to a movie depicting it).
      I have come to know many women who have been able to get themselves out of porn and stripping and almost invariably they have a history of sexual abuse (of course). Prolifers need to be be clear that we believe in the human dignity of EVERY person, including women who end up in the sex industry, and therefore that contributing to the sex industry with one’s money or presence is NOT consistent with prolife values.

      • Liz

        I agree with you. He was probably justifying his own behavior because 1. he liked it and 2. he didn’t see the women as sexually abused, low self worth etc, (in his defense, they are acting for their job) he probably saw them as women who loved what they do and not demeaning. Ask any man if they’d let their grown daughter be a porn actress or a stripper. Turn the tables on them and make him think of them as a person they truly know/love and morality will hit them. If they think they can have it both ways and say “I’d disown my daughter but I support the sex industry”, you’ve still made your point anyway. Everyone deserves to be loved and respected, especially victims who are lost.

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000084671427 Tj Freezn

          That’s not going to work anymore, Liz.

          Movies like the recent ”That’s My Boy” strongly promote (via comedy, but comedy is a great indirect preaching tool, like the move ”When Harry Met Sally”) sexual immorality,
          especially full blood relatives having sexual INCEST.
          …plus they promote other still (for now) taboo sexual relationships.
          So no, your question will be increasingly answered as these men being more than willing to have others have sex with their own daughters and or wives, as long as those females feel like they’re enjoying it and or making a lot of money doing so.
          I’m a man and this slide of society’s into sexual depravity disgusts me…

        • gigi4747

          “Ask any man if they’d let their grown daughter be a porn actress or a stripper. Turn the tables on them and make him think of them as a person they truly know/love and morality will hit them.”
          That IS what I always ask guys when this topic comes up, including my ex. I’ll keep saying it, but most find ways to justify strip clubs, etc, anyways. Maybe a more effective question would be to ask if they know any little girls who want to grow up and take their clothes off for strange men some day. Of course that’s no little girl’s dream, which should tell people that if women DO end up in the sex industry it’s because something has gone really wrong along the way. (And that wrong of course is sexual abuse.)

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Denise-Theisman-Brooks/100000188552829 Denise Theisman Brooks

    history is repeating itself. much like Rome, and we all know what happened to them, we have become a hedonistic society where no boundaries exist in obtaining personal pleasure…sexual or otherwise! and i have to ask…is this what the feminists had in mind all along? the right to be as degrading and inconsiderate as the opposite sex…something that they complained about for so many years?!? shouldn’t they rise above?how is this a good thing? so, i guess the message is, it’s ok to think of men and women as sex objects! gone are the days of women wanting to be respected for more than their bodies! wow…what an accomplishment!!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000084671427 Tj Freezn

      Movies like the recent ”That’s My Boy” strongly promote (via comedy,
      but comedy is a great indirect preaching tool, like the move ”When
      Harry Met Sally”) sexual immorality,
      especially full blood relatives having sexual INCEST.
      …plus they promote other still (for now) taboo sexual relationships.

      I’m a man and this slide of society’s into sexual depravity disgusts me…

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Michelle-M-Williams/1021964754 Michelle M. Williams

        Please tell me when society was not “sexually depraved” and I will give you 100 dollars.

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000084671427 Tj Freezn

          Percentage-wise is what matters, not zero versus one or more.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Michelle-M-Williams/1021964754 Michelle M. Williams

      So no one had sex before the invention of iPhones? When people talk about the so called “good ole days” what exactly are they talking about? The 1950s were not the “good ole days”, plenty of people were sleeping around behind each other’s backs. The 1800′s were not the “good ole days”. Working class white women and non-white women were completely fair game for sexual assault. Even rich white women could not be protected against sexual assault by their husbands. More women had a life closer to Tess of the d’Urbervilles than Elizabeth Bennett. And there have always been debaucherous people (Benjamin Franklin, the “Happy Valley set” etc). Even when the birth certificates and marriage certificates of colonial era America is compared it is obvious that there was a lot of premarital sex. Genetic testing on graveyards as shown that there has always been a high level of false paternity throughout the ages.

      Sex workers have existed since day one. Every war had “camp followers”. Every port and town had a section of town where everyone knew you could “find some”. Just because technology has introduced a new medium to the game does not mean human behavior any different.

      Women checking out and fantasizing about other men is nothing new. Paul Newman, James Cagney, Clark Gable, Rock Hudson, and James Dean all had millions of women lusting after them long before Channing Tatum was thought of. I am sure women lusted after the neighborhood or village hunk before moving pictures were invented and would even sleep with him too.

      There are 7 billion people on the planet and it didn’t just happen from people holding hands and singing carols.

      • http://www.facebook.com/allyson.borden Allyson Borden

        The problem lies in the fact that “we” (society) could be different but choose not to by taking the easy road. Just because it has “always been this way” doesnt mean it cant be different today. If we dont stand for something, we will fall for anything.

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/Michelle-M-Williams/1021964754 Michelle M. Williams

          The only thing short of lobotomizing people wouldn’t change anything. The only societies that have did a really good job at limiting “premarital sex” are extremely conservative Muslim societies. Do you want that for society? Or do you want society to be free?

    • ProTruth2

      much like Rome, and we all know what happened to them

      They converted to Christianity and subsequently turned to persecuting Christians who dissented from the religious orthodoxy established by councils of bishops. It’s an irony that many modern Christians would do well to think about.

  • beaarthur

    The problem in your mind only exists when the so-called oversexualization of America is targeted TO women, rather than making them the oft objects of male dominance. I don’t know whether to be appalled that you’re calling out this movie for letting women be sexual beings or that so many people find Channing Tatum attractive. It’s about time women had the same sexual freedoms readily afforded to men, and have been since the dawn of time. The double standard that the female is the recipient, not the aggressor, is slowly crumbling. But with ultra conservatives like you the double standards will continue and that is sad. I consider myself conservative, but more so fiscally. Women WANT to see men shake their stuff, we want to see lust, sex and all the things that are going on in our mind, because we are basically shunned for wanting sex, enjoying sex and watching sex on the screen, because, well, we can! Men have done it and nobody has poo-poohed it, but OMG women treating men like sex objects, God forbid!!! I’m happily married, kids the whole works, and I love looking at men, I won’t cheat, but I like sex and enjoy looking at sexually attractive men. That is NOT a crime, nor is it a sin. Men can do it, have done it, will do it, only they don’t need the accountability to do so, why do we?

    • trishalou

      Who says it is not a sin? You?

    • http://www.facebook.com/allyson.borden Allyson Borden

      I have absolutely no interest in looking at other men. I am completely satisfied in my marriage therefore I do not have to seek out other avenues for “stimulation.” So, dont say all women want what you want because a lot of us do not. Speak for yourself.

    • Guest

      Hear, hear!

    • Bridgett

      In the Bible I believe it was Jesus who said that if a man so much as looked at another woman & lusted after her has already committed adultery. So their you have it! Looks like someone is speaking for her self & doesn’t seem to know what the Bible says about lust & other things to do with sex, just saying.

      • Detroiter327

        If a man is caught in the act of raping a young
        woman who is not engaged, he must pay fifty pieces of silver to her father.
        Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he will never be
        allowed to divorce her.
        -Deuteronomy
        22:28-29
        Sex in the bible. Rape a woman and then pay her father like she is a prostitute. Then make the woman marry her attacker. Just saying.

        • Anonymous

          Incorrect translation. The verb “rape” is properly translated as “seduce” in this passage. This paying of the money is intended as a punishment for the seducer, who must take responsibility for his actions.

    • Miguel

      Be careful with the illusion of “sexual equality.” You believe that female sexuality can be the same as male sexuality, but you’re actually reducing female sexuality to male sexuality. Keep in mind that men and women are biologically different.

      “Men can do it, have done it, will do it, only they don’t need the accountability to do so, why do we?”
      Also, you do realize that women can already have sex whenever they want? You don’t believe me? Just look at our society.

  • Jenny

    ” I do think that there are more purposes behind sex than procreation. I support every couple’s own decision to use contraception that prevents a pregnancy, if that’s what they want. I am opposed only to contraception that kills a baby who has already been created – because that’s really no different in effect from abortion.”
    Kristi, first of all I want to say that I always enjoy your opinion pieces and look forward to reading them. You are a strong voice for the pro life movement. I do take issue with your above comment, however. I think that even if a couple is married, it is harmful for them to use contraception. Having the “contraceptive mentality” method married or not is detrimental. When a couple isn’t open to new life, they are using each other. They are engaging in the very act that is meant for creating new life without the intention of letting a new life being created, if that is God’s will. NFP is wonderful because it respects the integrity and fertility of each person while allowing the couple to postpone pregnancy if that is what is desired. We have to ask ourselves “What is the purpose of marriage and the sexual act?”

    • Kristiburtonbrown

      Thanks for your kind words, Jenny. I appreciate you taking the time to explain your position. I really do believe, though, that every couple should have the choice to use or not use birth control that prevents a pregnancy. Any birth control method that could kill a growing baby should obviously be off limits. But, I don’t see anywhere in the Bible where we are commanded to have as many children as possible (I realize not everyone – or even most – who use NFP believe that) or where we are commanded to reject all pregnancy prevention methods. I also don’t believe the Bible teaches that sex is only for procreation.

      NFP is a great method, if that’s what people choose, but I think there are equally appropriate other methods that do not ever take a human life. Not sure if you’ve ever heard of Tim Challies (a pastor), but he has done a great job of explaining the issue of birth control for Christians: http://www.challies.com/christian-living/the-bible-and-birth-control-part-2.

      I personally completely disagree that couples who use an appropriate form of birth control are “using each other.” I’m sure this is not how you meant it, but I think that is an unfair judgment of people’s hearts as only each husband and wife knows how they view each other. Plus, I don’t really think that NFP is much different in the end – people still engage “in the very act that is meant for creating new life without the intention of letting a new life be created”. I don’t see much difference in the hearts of people who use a bc method (that is never fail-proof) and prefer not to get pregnant, but are completely open to God’s will and people who use NFP to specifically prevent pregnancy but are also open to God’s will.

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  • Miguel

    “For those who will undoubtedly inform me that sex is not all about
    procreation, don’t worry…I agree with you. I do think that there are
    more purposes behind sex than procreation. I support every couple’s own
    decision to use contraception that prevents a pregnancy, if that’s what
    they want. I am opposed only to contraception that kills a baby who has
    already been created – because that’s really no different in effect from
    abortion.”

    You should read G.E.M Anscombe’s “Contraception and Chastity.” It won’t change your mind right away, but you should look at it as a challenge. Also, have you read the Papal Encyclical “Humanae Vitae”? I know you’re not Catholic but you don’t have to be.