Opinion

Marcy’s story: “Adoption was the best option for both me and my baby”

Permission only for IAMUNTOLD story

(IAmUntold) A single mom with no support system and faced with a second pregnancy. As I walked through the doors of a place that I thought would help me find the solution to my “problem,” I found a much different answer, but one that brought joy to more than just me.

I had a very difficult and unloving childhood. I was the victim of sexual assault and I did not finish high school. I was unemployed and struggled with mental health issues. I had a child I was determined to raise, but parenting was challenging for me. I was a loving and attentive parent to my son, but I was a single mother with no support from anyone.

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Marcy’s birth daughter

When my son was only five months old, I became pregnant again.

My first thought was to have an abortion. I didn’t see any possible way I could parent another child. I went to a local Care Net crisis pregnancy center thinking about getting an abortion. At Care Net I was reassured that terminating the pregnancy was not my only option. I did not fully realize what happened during an abortion.  Once I was educated on what it meant to have an abortion, I knew I couldn’t go through with it. I decided that adoption was the best option for both me and my baby and I was referred to Bethany Christian Services.

I looked through profiles of prospective adoptive families and one stood out to me. I prayed and asked God to guide me and He kept directing me to one particular family. When we met for the first time, I shared with the family that I wanted my daughter’s middle name to be “Faith.”  I told them, “I need to have faith to give her up and trust you.” The couple then shared that if they had a daughter someday, they were already planning to give her the middle name of “Faith.” That was the sign to me that God was bonding us together.

I received on-going support during the adoption process. My Bethany caseworker took me to all of my prenatal appointments and watched my young son while I saw the doctor. I joined a women’s Bible study and my faith grew.

When my daughter was born, I spent time early on caring for her and invited the adoptive parents to stay at the hospital and spend time with her as well. While it was not an easy process, I followed through with the adoption plan. A month after the baby was born, I got a job. A few months later, I moved to an apartment in a safer neighborhood. As a result, I was better able to care for my son.

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Today, I have a positive, open relationship with the adoptive family and it brings me joy to see how well my birth daughter is doing. I believe adoption is the best of both worlds. I gave my daughter a better life than I could give her and I gave this gift to two people who can’t have children. I still see her and she’s always going to know me. She has a mom and dad who love her to death.

She’s always smiling and I can tell she’s very happy. I have peace with my decision, and I consider her a blessing.

“But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.” 2 CHRONICLES 15:7

Editor’s Note: Original story shared on IAMUNTOLD.ORG  – please visit the site to view the music video of UNTOLD, by Matthew West, along with other stories and resources. Story is reprinted here with permission.

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