Opinion

Men deserve the chance to speak out on abortion, too

It’s not unusual to hear pro-aborts say that men don’t have a right to speak out against abortion. They don’t deserve a seat at the table. And now one pro-abortion advocate is going so far as saying that she wants to silence the voices of all men on abortion. According to this writer, who blogs at a website called Abortion Gang, because men can’t get pregnant, they shouldn’t be allowed to express any opinion on abortion whatsoever.

I want to silence all the male voices in the abortion discussion.

… The main anti-choice voices for the U.S. are also all men. In fact, the majority of persons in government who are anti-choice, are men. And none of them can get pregnant. The people who are making decisions that affect the lives of women, CAN’T EVEN GET PREGNANT!

And so, I want to silence the voices of all men. I am so tired of men giving their opinion about abortion. I am so tired of it that I am willing to sacrifice the voices of all the men who support women. I truly believe that if men were no longer allowed to speak on the topic of abortion, every country would be pro-choice. Anti-choice women get abortions too. Abortion crosses every religious, cultural, and political line. The only line it can’t cross is biological sex, and that is where the problem lies.

And she wonders why people equate feminism with misandry.

Most of her argument is factually incorrect – the majority of women are pro-life, after all – but let’s just ignore that and focus on the topic at hand. Do men deserve the right to offer an opinion on abortion?

The answer is absolutely, without a doubt, yes.

No, men cannot get pregnant. But guess what women can’t do without men? Get pregnant. Fathers are the other forgotten voices in the abortion debate. The child that the mother aborts is half his, but he has no say in the matter. If a woman wants to have an abortion, then she can have it, regardless of whether the father wants his baby or not. The point is, that baby is half his. It’s the little fact that so often gets left out of the abortion debate. Yes, women carry the babies. But it’s still half his.

But hey, by this writer’s logic, no child with a disability should be allowed to be aborted unless the parents have that same disability. Because an able-bodied person can’t possibly know what it’s like, right? So why should anyone be allowed to make that kind of decision when she herself is not disabled?

The other inanity in this writer’s argument is that you apparently must be a woman in order to speak out for or against abortion. This is like saying you must be black in order to have an opinion on civil rights, or Jewish in order to speak about the horrors of the Holocaust. Standing up against inhumane actions does not require a certain race, age, or gender. Speaking out for those who do not have a voice doesn’t, either.

Men have every right to speak out against abortion. Abortion isn’t an issue of gender. It’s an issue of life – and everyone has the right to defend it.

   
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  • Martin Sanders

    Thank you for standing up for us Cassy.

  • http://twitter.com/Factsseeker Factsseeker

    Probably the biggest human rights issue of the 21st century is that men have no independent reproductive rights like all women have. World society must invest in research that will facilitate men having children independently of a women. Research shows that men make just as good single parents as women. The myth that fathers can’t manage without a women has now been dispelled. The next step is up to a more enlightened US government.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=585273802 Kelsey Shannon Arnold

      And technology… There is currently no way to bring a child into the world without a woman helping somewhere along the way.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579647602 Rog Clarke

    Roe vs Wade
    “When women are compelled to carry and bear children, they are subjected
    to ‘involuntary servitude’ in violation of the Thirteenth
    Amendment….[E]ven if the woman has stipulated to have consented to the
    risk of pregnancy, that does not permit the state to force her to remain
    pregnant”

    when do men get the paper equivalent of the right to financially “opt out”???

    it has been given to women in the extreme and even women who dont believe in abortion have safe drop boxes to relinquish responsibility of being a parent, yet men are subject under penalty of prison to financially support a woman`s choice??? how is this equality????

    As a man im tired of being silenced on this and our voice needs to be heard!!

    Her body Her choice?? Then HER responsibility,,,FFS….

    • http://twitter.com/TodThompson Tod Thompson

      I get what you’re trying to say. I really do. There is a fundamental unfairness here. However, I have to ask: What decent man is going to “opt out” of their responsibility toward their children? I would submit that such a man is not a “man” at all.

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=585273802 Kelsey Shannon Arnold

        What do you say, then, to women who “opt out” of their responsibility toward their children by having abortions? A man who doesn’t want to be a father is a deadbeat dad, but a woman who doesn’t want to be a mother is pro-choice.

        • Dena

          Being pro-choice is not about opting out of motherhood. There are PLENTY of women across this country, across the world, who are pro-choice and are mothers. My mother is pro-choice. Plenty of my friend’s mother’s are pro-choice. Pro-choice means believing that women should be able to decide what happens to their bodies (I’m not arguing that male partners don’t have a say in decision making–depending on the specific couple I’m almost positive they do). As a pro-choice daughter, I believe that in an ideal world, maybe abortion wouldn’t exist, but because it does and because we have so many young girls getting pregnant and not receiving adequate sex education, because we have women being raped day after day, abortion does. And because abortion exists, women need to be able to choose whether they’re going to carry a baby to term–sometimes it’s too expensive for a woman to carry a pregnancy to term. Sometimes, she doesn’t have the luxury to take time off work, maybe there’s no one to help her as she carries a child to term.

          Everyone’s entitled to their opinions, but just as all women and men have the choice whether to carry a pregnancy to term, there need to be safeguards for those whom carrying pregnancy to term is not an option.

          • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=585273802 Kelsey Shannon Arnold

            I didn’t mean to imply that all pro-choicers wish to avoid parenthood, only that those who use abortion to avoid parenthood are pro-choice. I know several people personally who say “I would never have an abortion personally but it’s the woman’s choice…” Interestingly, they never define exactly why they would “never” have an abortion.

            You said that in an ideal world, abortion wouldn’t exist. What makes a world without abortion better than one with it? Does that imply that abortion is somehow inherently bad?

            The truth is that abortion has been with us for centuries, and we will never fully eradicate it. Desperate women will always find a reason or an excuse that their pregnancy cannot continue. I don’t think of these women as bad people because I know they don’t think of themselves that way. But there is always someone willing to help.
            There are crisis pregnancy centers (which outnumber abortion clinics
            something like 5:1) who will bend over backwards to save a baby because
            they believe that every life is precious far beyond material wealth.
            They will continue to care for the mother and the baby after the birth
            because that is what it means to truly be pro-LIFE!

            You also imply that poor education and rape are the only reasons we have abortion, and that because of that all women need to be able to choose whether to bring their babies to term. I admit I don’t understand what you mean here–if you intend to suggest a rape exception, fine, we can debate that. However, what about the young professional who simply doesn’t want to have a baby because it would interfere with her career plans? (It happens. I don’t have the statistics, but it’s much more common than abortions due to rape. http://www.guttmacher.org/pubs/journals/3711005.pdf)

            Finally, you mention that “all women and men have the choice whether to carry a pregnancy to term.” This is simply incorrect–men do not have that choice. That is what I was trying to point out above. There is a double standard when it comes to children: it seems that women can do no wrong, and men can do no right.

      • http://twitter.com/Mark_Neilg Mark Neil

        In turn I ask you, what decent woman would kill off her unborn child, abandon their born child at a drop box (safe haven Laws, precisely the concept you are condemning), or give away their child to complete strangers in an adoption?

        I would suggest that attempts to shame with comments like “such a man is not a man at all” seems rather unfair of someone who fights for the rights of women to do precisely the same thing, and fails to likewise condemn women.

  • musiciangirl591

    whenever i see posts that men shouldn’t have a say in abortion, i think of our SFL president… who happens to be a man!

  • Harry

    I may never be a woman who can get pregnant, but I was once a baby and know the importance of having the right to live!

  • http://www.facebook.com/christine.gray.3323 Christine Gray

    By that logic, any woman who has her tubes tied, has had a hysterectomy, has hit menopause, or can’t conceive for any given reason should have no voice in either. That would eliminate most of the radical feminists who are fighting for abortion rights.

    • Lena

      You don’t really offer a parallel argument here, as menopausal women etc may have previously had children and child bearing experiences. Aside from this, the ethical issue involves the demand that a woman carry a child to term, potentially against her will, which envolves servitude and a violation of her personhood, RIGHTS that she is afforded as a citizen (rights which the unborn/fetuses don’t have as they are not citizens in legal terms).

      • http://www.facebook.com/michellelivigni Michelle Li Vigni

        you don’t see a parallel argument because there is none. being pregnant is not called servitude and as a feminist woman speaking- calling it that just raises dramatics. the child in utero has every quality necessary to be considered a human being. just because you cannot physically see their faces does not mean they do not exist.

  • Kerrye D.

    The opposite has always intrigued me – that women protesting their “rights to their own bodies” would allow a man to protest with them. I’ve always seen any man FOR abortion, as the “dead-beat” who wants out of his responsibility. (As Rog points out, talking his girl into abortion is his ONLY way to “opt out”.) The jerk boyfriend who hands her some cash and drops her off at the clinic, never to be heard from again. In my opinion, the only REAL MEN in the debate are the ones standing on the Pro-Life side – fighting for babies, rather than their easy way out of any responsibility.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579647602 Rog Clarke

      i will tell you something , when an older woman entraps you as a minor into having a child and you have child support debt when you hit 18 your choice becomes important to you(yes condoms were used)…. im not talking about forced abortions or forcing women to carry to term only financial separation for men who didnt want to become a parent (has nothing to do with a womans choice only the mans choice) women have this choice and if equality rules then men are due the same right to choose…..

      • GiselleN

        News flash – sex has consequences. There’s your choice right there!!

        • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579647602 Rog Clarke

          news flash the supreme court has already vetoed your opinion..
          Roe vs Wade
          “When women are compelled to carry and bear children, they are subjected
          to ‘involuntary servitude’ in violation of the Thirteenth
          Amendment….[E]ven if the woman has stipulated to have consented to the
          risk of pregnancy, that does not permit the state to force her to remain
          pregnant.”
          consent to risk is NOT the same as consent to parent…

          • GiselleN

            What I said is not an opinion – Laws can’t change the fact that pregnancy is a natural consequence of sex. Roe v Wade also said that at the time they could not define when life began. This was because in 1973 ultrasound technologies and what we knew about prenatal development was very limited. Does that mean that government has the right to decide when life begins? I don’t think so. Roe v Wade is a violation of basic constitutional rights – the right to life.

          • Issme

            GiselleN hits the nail right on the head – this issue is not about courts, law, legal terms, or what human kind decides. The issue is biological, natural, and placing the term ‘involuntary servitude’ is purely a rhetorical joke. Read up on how Jane Roe felt about abortion afterward.

          • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579647602 Rog Clarke

            this still doesnt discount the right to have safe drop boxes or the right to put the child up for adoption,, like i said im only interested in a safe legal way for men to opt out of parenthood (not interested in abortion but the laws apply because in this because they separate risk of pregnancy from consent to parent),, currently female statutory rapists are collecting child support from their victims,,(re victimizing them) while that is a worst case scenario its still happening,, the second you tell me all after pregnancy options have been removed for women that is when i wont say another word (unlikely) ,,
            BTW i didnt place anything into that quote just copy and pasted it as is.

          • Issme

            Rog, if you want to opt out of parenthood, here are your options: Do not have sex or Get a Vasectomy. Abortion is not a way to opt out of parenthood.

          • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=579647602 Rog Clarke

            abortion is NOT the only way women have to opt out of parenthood to try and say this is a lie…

            adoption and safe haven laws ,,, look it up
            the right to give up a child for adoption (living breathing child that requires its parent)
            and “safe haven” drop centers at hospitals fire stations ect (also the right to legally abandon a healthy breathing child)

            are rights ONLY given to women

            so get off your abortion kick

            i used roe vs wade to prove consenting to sex does NOT mean consenting to parenthood…

          • Issme

            Let me understand, you want to be able to take the child you fathered from a woman, and put them up for adoption (which is not a right only to women) and “safe haven” drop centers without the mother’s involvement? Keep it simple Rog, do not reproduce. Yes, when you consent to sex you consent to parenthood. That’s a part of sex whether you, society, or the world likes it or not.

          • http://www.facebook.com/michellelivigni Michelle Li Vigni

            abortion doesn’t make you not a parent. it makes you the parent of a dead child. when you don’t believe you can take care of a child giving that child a chance at a better life is the better option.

          • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100003586781928 Magdalene Prodigal

            How is the murder of an innocent human being an ‘option’? The mothers also live with the consequences for the rest of their lives.

          • Michelle

            news flash- the plaintiff in Roe V. Wade Jane Roe regrets that case calling it the biggest mistake of her life. Also she fights for everyone’s right to live from conception to natural death.

            also the Supreme Court made laws back in the day giving whites the right to own blacks they called them inhuman just like the do with these children in the womb. if it weren’t for people standing up to that then where would we be?

          • Dena

            @facebook-579647602:disqus I completely and wholeheartedly agree!

      • Dave

        If you are not speaking about killing your child, but about legal/financial issues about child support/parental responsibilities, that is for the courts to decide. But as was previously stated, sex has consequences (along with the most obvious statement that the only absolute method of birth control is abstinence.

  • http://twitter.com/kimketola Kim Ketola

    Men are hurt by abortion too! I wrote a free book for men after hearing their hearts http://cradlemyheart.org/free-ebook-for-men/

  • http://twitter.com/Mark_Neilg Mark Neil

    Well said. Thank you.

  • steve

    I saw a bumper sticker that said “77% of all people against abortion are men. 100% of them can’t get pregnant.” They should have one that says. “100% of all people for abortion are alive. 0% of them were aborted.” Like the old Reagan quote, “I’ve noticed everyone who is for abortion has already been born.”

    • Issme

      Love this!

    • Michelle

      I would so buy that!!!! :D

  • Potter

    The argument a pro-abortionist would respond with to this article is that, yes it is half of the father’s, but it is still the woman’s body. The counter argument to this is that the baby has a body too.

  • Lena

    This is why surrogacy exists. If a man wants a child yet cannot come to an agreement w/a female partner as to carrying the child, he is more thanfree to opt for a surrogate, who, under legal contract, can consent to carrying a child to term. Problem Solved.

  • A Heartbroken Grandmother

    Thank you so much for telling the plight fathers of unborn children must bear. My son and I begged his girlfriend not to abort his baby. We offered to adopt the baby, but to no avail. Her comment was she could never adopt her baby! Really? We will never know exactly what happened to his child, just that we got a call late one evening that she “lost” the baby. We can’t prove it, but we just know in our hearts what happened; fathers and grandparents just know. Our family lost a child. My son had a right to his child just as much as the mother. How can I tell others about the problem fathers and grandparents face? No one speaks of this but there is great pain in our country. I feel compelled to help the unborn and save them.

    • Michelle

      this made me cry. i am so so sorry for your loss <3

  • Michelle

    as a pro-life feminist and former fetus I’m ashamed I have this ‘right’ to chose the life or death of my own child.

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