Shocking: Intrauterine contents can recall words heard in-utero after birth

Editor’s note: This is a humorous presentation of very real science

In a shocking study published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, researchers found that fetuses who hear specific, repeated sounds in utero are likely to recognize those sounds – and differentiate them from others – after they are born. The study, conducted by researchers from the University of Helsinski, revealed that blobs of tissue are capable not only of hearing sounds in utero, but also of remembering and recognizing those sounds weeks or months later, after they are released from the uterine environment.

In the study, thirty-three women experiencing intrauterine growth (labeled by some as “pregnancy”) were separated into two groups of sixteen and seventeen, respectively. Women of the latter group were given CDs which repeated a sequence of nonsensical phrases (tatata and tatota). The CD was repeated regularly by women of the latter group during the intrauterine growth period. In some of the sequences, variations of pitch were incorporated into the nonsense phrases, but the ‘words’ stayed the same. In an incomprehensible conclusion, these researchers found that, after hearing these babbling sounds repeatedly, the intrauterine contents of the second group recognized the phrases after birth. The sixteen blobs who had not been exposed to the CD’s sounds did not display a marked response to the phrases after birth.

Researchers are discovering the growing ledger of abilities attributed to these clumps of intrauterine cells at an alarming rate. With the ability to hear, remember, and develop shockingly humanoid characteristics such as cardiovascular systems and neurological pathways as early as the first trimester, one wonders: Is the world approaching the heretofore-unimaginable day when these intrauterine contents might be labeled human by those outside of the medical and scientific communities? And if so, what effect will that classification have on major media outlets, such as MSNBC, who have worked tirelessly to ensure that scientific and medical facts not be integrated into pop culture?

  • princessjasmine45

    I don’t like to use extremes, but in this case, it seems appropriate:

    EVERY new discovery that comes out of embryology is ALWAYS bad news for the pro death camp.

  • Dano

    Amazing! I spoke often into my wife’s stomach directly to our baby nearly everyday of our pregnancy. Well at birth the doctors quickly move the baby to a close by station to clean them up, slather meds on their eyes, tag them with an anklet and give them a shot. To which our tiny baby started screaming his head off. So I was standing nearby and moved closer and started to speak to him like I did everyday and he immediately hushed the crying and turned his head to see where that familiar voice was coming from. Everyone in the room noticed this and marveled.

  • Dano

    Amazing! I spoke often into my wife’s stomach directly to our baby nearly everyday of our pregnancy. Well at birth the doctors quickly move the baby to a close by station to clean them up, slather meds on their eyes, tag them with an anklet and give them a shot. To which our tiny baby started screaming his head off. So I was standing nearby and moved closer and started to speak to him like I did everyday and he immediately hushed the crying and turned his head to see where that familiar voice was coming from. Everyone in the room noticed this and marveled.

  • Hardcandy6386

    Is there a reason why this article is so ridiculously sarcastic…? I get the point they are trying to make & I’m pretty sure that this isn’t anything new, but the point gets lost in unnecessary words like blob & intrauterine growth. Grow up a little & maybe your article will be better received by the general public.

  • Mamabear

    While my daughter was expecting, she and my son-in-law, both musicians, played a lot of classical music for my not-yet-born grandson. One day, my daughter told me, “I’m sorry, but we are pretty sure the baby does not like your favorite composer. He definitely responds more to late romantic era composers than baroque music.”
    Each of my children showed definite responses to music before birth, too. I swear the one who later took years of ballet was dancing before birth every time she heard music.